The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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