He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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