Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
