I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
My room smells like vodka and shame
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
