Dual....:-)
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
We are two peas in an std pod
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Randomize
