I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
she pinky promised me she was 18
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
