he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize
