its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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