Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Randomize