Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
