It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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