i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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