I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Can I color on your dick again?
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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