I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
only you would photoshop your dick
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
