Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
