Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Randomize
