"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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