Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
