More tranny stories later!
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
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