the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
she peed on how many people?
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
He? As in you personified your dick?
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
The cops high fived after they tackled you
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
