Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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