do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
