I skipped work to stalk him.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Randomize
