i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
