Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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