Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
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