# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
