she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize
