before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
