I look better un-naked...
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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