the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
