How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Randomize
