oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize
