i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
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