im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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