Michael Bay diarrhea
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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