okay pat passed out under dana's car
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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