I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
What did we do last night that was yellow?
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
It's just like the Real World with babies
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
