I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
i think i just naturally attract stoners
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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