its not stalking. its research.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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