You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
