Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
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