i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Text me some of your sweat
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize