Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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