What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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