No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
