Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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