I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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