I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Fuck appropriateness.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
