I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
