It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Randomize
